Edward Furlong. Tara Reid. David Boreanaz. Danny Trejo. Dennis Fucking Hopper. Ok, so I could care less about the guy from Buffy/Angel (Boreanaz) and Tara Reid (well, at least her acting skills) but still a nice ensemble cast which would be enough to make me watch pretty much any movie. The fact they are all together in a sequel to a film I really liked makes it a no brainer. Unfortunately, no brainer is exactly what the film is.
In a very Reservoir Dogs-y way, we are introduced to Luc Crash (Boreanaz) and his group of Satan worshiping killers. His plan is to become Satan himself and to do this he needs to perform some sacred ceremony with his girlfriend Lola (Reid). Local Jimmy Cuervo (Furlong) is planning on running away with his girlfriend Lilly (Emmanuelle Chriqui), much to the displeasure of her father (Trejo) and the townspeople. Jimmy and Lilly cross paths with Luc, who used to be friends with Jimmy. Luc and his gang kill them but Jimmy comes back to get revenge, thanks to The Crow.
This film was, frankly, a mess. Over the top acting, a convoluted story and Dennis Hopper as a Satanic priest/pimp fluent in Ebonics. You'd have to see it to understand. Better yet, don't. Furlong, who I like in many films, was sadly just not good and Boreanaz was down right annoying. Tara Reid looked great but her acting was amateurist at best. The only thing I liked about the film was Danny Trejo's crow dance at the end. This film screamed DTV and was just really bad.
RATING: 2/10
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